Exploring the American Wilderness and Other Adventures

Charleston, South Carolina

South Carolina was where I began adulthood. When I turned 18 years old, I promptly enlisted in the US Army, and Fort Jackson, South Carolina, was my boot camp location. I attended boot camp at a time when there were still many male-only boot camps, which meant that Fort Jackson was considered a cushioned place to be introduced to the military. Maybe it was, or is, I do not know. What I know is that the things expected to be difficult were not for me. I enlisted while homeless and was very happy to run and do pushups in exchange for security. What was difficult for me was the culture shock of being in an entirely different culture than northern Minnesota and the diversity amongst my new peers. There were non-English speaking soldiers, women my age who were incredibly strong and outgoing, and individuals who appeared weak and unmotivated, determined not to succeed. I was strong and determined, which helped me the entire way. I was also quiet until I was not; when I was not, it was usually because I was frustrated. Much like now, which I suppose is not a favorable reflection of my character. I remember one time when I had called a male soldier a bitch because I thought he was acting like a little baby, and my 18-year-old self definitely believed that shaming him would somehow motivate him. How embarrassing. Well, not helping himself with our peers (he got hazed pretty hard after this), he went to our drill sergeants and told on me. Our leadership was so mad. They were not upset because I did that. They were mad because the laws were changing in how servicemembers could be treated, and once it was reported to them that I had harassed this person, they had no choice but to provide me with a meaningful punishment. That meant I had to low crawl through the sand for hours. It was awful. I remember it like it was yesterday.

After Fort Jackson, I was stationed near Augusta, Georgia, where I ended up marrying the father of my children. He was also on active duty, and between the both of us, we lived in Georgia, North Carolina, Alabama (twice), Kansas, Connecticut, New Jersey, and DC. The boys and I are familiar with the East Coast culture and climate and have often longed to be back in it after we moved to Idaho.

Lolo has been in South Carolina for a year, attending the Navy Nuclear Power Training Command (NNPTC). This is the one who taught himself to read because I was too involved in teaching Thing One to read and potty training the rest of them. This is the one who attended two colleges full-time during his freshman year while working full-time and also trying to mentor and take care of two of his brothers. Knowing how strong his character is and his incredible level of motivation, NNPTC still tried to kill him. It is compared to MIT but completed in half the time. These sailors live and breathe nuclear power, and it is a school designed for them to fail. He has had to accept less-than-perfect scores; he has had to learn that taking care of his basic needs is key to professional progress and success, he has had to live with someone who makes everything around them much more difficult than it should be and he has had to learn to manage the grief involved in having me be afflicted with cancer while he cannot do anything to help. NBC News did an article this year that briefly touched on how taxing this program is for these students, here. There have been periods of him not calling home, needing to be removed from what is happening here; there have been periods of him calling home frequently, there have been tearful conversations of exhaustion and fear of failure, and then there was finally, the series of calls saying he was knocking his final exams out of the park and that I would need to be in Charleston to watch him graduate.

NNPTC Graduation, Goose Creek, SC

Patriots Point Naval & Maritime Museum, Charleston, SC

Patriots Point was a must-do for this Navy mom while visiting Charleston. Lolo remained in his uniform for this self-guided tour, which gained him free admission as well as more attention than he would prefer. USS Yorktown (CV-10) is the aircraft carrier docked at Patriots Point for public tours. It was the tenth carrier in the Navy and earned the Presidential Unit Citation and 11 battle stars during WW2. “In the 1950s, YORKTOWN was modernized to operate jet aircraft as an attack carrier (CVA). In 1957, she was re-designated an anti-submarine aircraft carrier (CVS), and would later earn 5 battle stars for service off Vietnam (1965-68). The ship also recovered the Apollo 8 astronauts and capsule (December 1968). YORKTOWN was decommissioned in 1970 and placed in reserve. In 1975, this historic ship was towed from Bayonne, NJ to Charleston to become the centerpiece of Patriots Point Naval & Maritime Museum.” patriotspoint.org/explore/uss-yorktown/

Fort Sumter, Charleston, SC

From Patriots Point, we were able to take a ferry to go see Fort Sumter. This is the location where the American Civil War began. Learning about these places in a classroom is wildly different than seeing them in person. Fort Sumter is TINY. It is incredible that it was considered a Union battle station to protect the harbor. It was not a brilliant plan. The island itself is man-made. By slaves. The construction began in the early 1800’s and 30 years later, it made its place in American history. Confederates ended up winning the battle against Fort Sumter by pummeling them with 3,500 tons of projectiles. The Union leader, Major Anderson, surrendered when supplies were impossibly low. Something I never remember learning was that after the Confederates surrendered and Anderson returned to his island to raise the flag he had taken with him during his surrender, the new President Lincoln had been invited to join the ceremony. Lincoln had declined, stayed in DC to attend Ford’s Theater, and was killed. Our tour guide said that there is a story that says Lincoln DID attend the flag-raising ceremony with Anderson and delivered an incredible speech, but the event went unnoticed because three days later, he was assassinated.

Folly Beach & Morris Island Lighthouse, Charleston, SC

Folly Beach was FUN! We really only went because it landed on every “things to do in South Carolina” list, not exactly because Lolo wanted to go. It was everything I remember about living in a beach town before we moved to Idaho. A crazy amount of cars, even more people on bicycles and walking, a ton of colorful and loud restaurants, and incredibly beautiful beaches. Lolo said that his cadre (I do not know if they are called cadre in the Navy) gave Folly Beach the reputation of being the place for sailors to get into trouble, so he and his friends usually go to more low-key beaches on the rare chances they can get away.

Morris Island Lighthouse is the tallest lighthouse in South Carolina. It was built in 1876. The lighthouse is on a tiny island that used to be much larger, but the development of the harbor for shipping has changed ocean currents, leading to the island slowly eroding away.

Sullivan Island, Charleston, SC

Sullivan Island was adorable. It was very different from Folly Beach. As much as Folly Beach was an ongoing party, Sullivan Island was quiet and relaxed. It was also an important location during the Civil War, and that is evident throughout the island as you see signs on many homes and buildings stating the historical importance of each location. It is the home to Fort Moultrie National Monument, which was originally built to protect the new America from the British. I think the most interesting thing about that was that they had built it with Palmetto logs because that was abundant in the region, but they learned that the logs were very soft compared to other lumber when the fort basically absorbed cannonball attacks instead of being destroyed. Like Fort Sumter, it is now the property of the National Park Service.

Unrelated but cool: Edgar Allen Poe was stationed at Fort Moultrie, which is the island where The Gold Bug takes place.

Magnolia Plantation and Gardens, Charleston, SC

This was my number one destination wish for my trip to Charleston. It is the top public attraction in what is called Lowcountry. It was established in the 1800’s by Rev. John Drayton, who had moved here from Philly. His wife hated it, so he forced their slaves to build “romantic gardens” to appease her. After employing numerous farming methods in an effort to retain their wealth, they learned that growing rice in the swamps was very profitable. They grew something called Golden Rice, which was very different from regular rice. It was dangerous for the slaves, who were the ones doing the labor. Their life expectancy was short, in large part because of the risks in the swamp – venomous snakes, alligators, insects, and more. It was powerful and humbling to hear the stories of the slaves who lived and worked here. Magnolia Plantation: “After Emancipation, roughly half of the newly freed African Americans stayed at Magnolia to work as paid gardeners, tour guides, and domestic servants. Descendants of the enslaved as well as other African American families lived on what was called the “Street” until the late 20th century.” Eventually, I am sure it is because of the labor shortage from no longer having forced labor, the Dreyton’s decided that tourism was their jam, and that has since become their focus. Magnolia Plantation and Gardens is listed with the Grand Canyon and Niagara Falls as the top three places you must see in the US (Baedeker’s Guide). And fun fact: the swamp in the movie Shrek is inspired by this plantation.

While wandering the trail system, I came upon a slave graveyard. It was heartbreaking. I continue to think of it often. There was no memorial or any evidence of work done in an attempt to identify who was buried there. It was simply a spot I stumbled upon. I am glad I did, but I continue to be disappointed in the limited honor given to those who were used to build this country to their own demise.

Boone Hall Plantation and Gardens, Mount Pleasant, SC

After touring Magnolia Plantation and Gardens, I wanted to see more. Boone Hall Plantation and Gardens was a different experience. Where our tour guides at Magnolia were black and told the brutal truth about the slaves who lived and worked there, our tour guide at Boone Hall was white and barely touched upon the dark history it is built upon. It was disappointing, and I felt embarrassed. Maybe it had nothing to do with the fact that she was white. I would enjoy discussing that.

The original owner was Major John Boone. One of his descendants was John Rutledge, one of the signers of the Declaration of Independence.

We began with a tour of the main house, where we were prohibited from taking photos. The house was beautiful. The slave quarters were placed in front of the house, along the road, so they were the first thing people saw when going there. This design was intended to demonstrate wealth and to prove what good slave owners the land owners were. Gross. The slave houses are currently set up to allow you to have a self-guided tour of what their lives had been like, with some volunteers for the plantation being available for discussion. The big business for Boone Hall was brick-making. All slave work. They made over 4 million bricks a year.

Although I feel they should improve upon how they choose to present history, it is a beautiful place. This is another location that was used to film The Notebook, and this is where Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively got married. Their poor choice of a wedding venue brought to light how it might be better not to use locations of tragedy for advertising your success or joy. Ryan Reynolds: “It’s impossible to reconcile. What we saw at the time was a wedding venue on Pinterest. What we saw after was a place built upon devastating tragedy. Years ago we got married again at home—but shame works in weird ways. A giant fucking mistake like that can either cause you to shut down or it can reframe things and move you into action. It doesn’t mean you won’t fuck up again. But re-patterning and challenging lifelong social conditioning is a job that doesn’t end.” It is hard to make mistakes publicly. I appreciate his honesty and accountability.

I know that Magnolia Foundation is involved in philanthropy, with a special focus on African American causes, but I could only find that Boone Hall has once donated toward the restoration of a historic school. We always have room to grow, and a successful tourist plantation is not an exception.

Cypress Gardens, Moncks Corner, SC

Yet another location used for filming The Notebook, but also the location for Swamp Thing, Cypress Gardens was one of my favorite places to visit. It was originally part of a rice-growing plantation, and after changing ownership over the generations, and hurricane destruction, the property finally settled on being under the ownership of the county. Now, for $10 or less a person, you can visit the swamparium, where you can learn about local wildlife and tour the small garden, and then take a row boat through the swamp. I loved it. Swamps make me feel like I am imaginary and beautiful. Even though there were other people rowing, it was quiet and peaceful.

Rainbow Row, Charleston, SC

Rainbow Row is 13 houses along the Charleston Harbor. These homes were built in the 1700s and were the original businesses and homes in the area. As things do, especially on the coasts, over a couple of hundred years, they became run down. In the early 1900s, new homeowners began taking over, painting their homes in bright colors. Charleston.com: “Many have speculated over the true reason for the color transformation of Rainbow Row. One theory is that the homes were painted various pastel colors so drunk sailors might find their way home easier. Others believe that the various hues were the merchants’ way of indicating what types of items they sold there. One other theory is that the homes were painted lighter colors to keep them cooler during the hot Charleston summers.”

The Tavern at Rainbow Row is the oldest liquor store in the US. It was originally “Seafarer’s Tavern,” but at some point became The Tavern. It has a history with pirates and, of course, war. It is kind of like a museum inside with how much work has been put into restoring the original architecture and furniture. They specialize in rare and unique drinks – Lolo enjoys dark, rich beer, and he chose one that costs over $25. I did not even know such a thing existed!

Every building and house in Charleston has some sort of historical relevance, and there are no ordinary structures. The photo below is the steeple of St. Michaels Church and the Charleston Post Office. Charleston has been called “The Holy City” because it has over 400 steeples and supposedly has a history of religious tolerance. I took 100 photos while walking around Charleston with Lolo and Last But Not Last. It was hard not to throw them all on this page. The history and the attempts to honor the history of one of the oldest places in the US are incredible.

My lodging was this Airbnb that is a retired yacht. It was not all that was advertised, and it was disappointing. It was very run down, but it was advertised as being refurbished and in good condition. I am glad for the experience, and it was very inexpensive at $77/night. Actually, while I write this, I think the best way to describe it is that it has about the same comfort and quality as you would find in a $77/night hotel room. 1 star. No recommendations.

Lolo said something that is still echoing in my tiny brain about how he did not join the Navy to endure such a rigorous and prestigious program only for himself; he did it for the entire family. His intention is to continue to pave the way for his brothers to have the freedom and space to try new things, see new places, and find themselves. So many kids come from what I call the poor ages and do everything they can not to look back like I did. But Lolo is not like anyone I know. Even though he has the opportunity now to turn his back entirely on his past, he is choosing to keep his hand out to help any of his brothers to launch themselves into better futures. Turning my back on my poor ages did not help me much, anyway – I ended up raising my own kids in poverty. His way is already better than the way I did it. He later asked me if I felt a sense of accomplishment in his recent graduation, and I felt like that was weird. No, I personally did not accomplish anything, but I am as proud as I can possibly be. I am proud that when he could have made no choices, he made a difficult choice for himself every day. He had many acceptable excuses to change his mind, and all I could ever tell him was that I trusted him to do what was right and would support him no matter what he decided. And each day, he decided to pursue the unknown future. A future that was certain to take him further from home. Places like Charleston, South Carolina. Not all places he lives or that I visit will attempt to have honor in reconciling the past with the present, but it gives me a lot to think about when I consider how I have mismanaged my own history and my children are trying not to repeat my mistakes.